Friday, October 12, 2012

day 12: handle your business

Anxiety and insecurity are not only ugly, they are not sweet. They are huge attention whores and only leave a girl drowning in her stupid drama, prayin' and hopin' that some sweet person is going to come and throw her a life preserver.   They prevent us from living fully and relishing in the amazing things that we so often fail to notice in our everyday lives.  Now, there is no shame in taking a helping hand once in a while, but there is no gain in sitting around waiting for someone to come save a sister from her own self.  No one likes a person who is needy.  And I'm gonna tell you that this anxiety ish that has gotten in my brain today has made me feel ultra nee-dee today.

Ultimately, the cold hard truth is that no one is going to save us from ourselves.  They can't.  It's impossible.  It is a choice that we have to make on our own.  And it's usually more difficult than we think we can handle at the moment.  Especially because the underlining belief is usually that something happening beyond our control is taking control of our lives.  

So how am I gonna get out of my drama and back to my sweet self?

I'm gonna pray.

I'm gonna focus on the things in my life that I have control over: my thoughts, my actions, my words.

I'm gonna spend some time with people and doing activities that make me happy.

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I'm gonna check some stuff off of my todo list and maybe even attempt reign in the beast of disorganization that has wreaked havoc in my once cozy little home office.

And then, once I've found myself back on sweet stable ground and my life is back under control and in perspective, I'm gonna address this drama mess.

But not until I know I can do it sweetly.  Addressing problems is about solving them, not creating more.

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